Lucius and Deatrice’s schedule for this month was supposed to be full, but she asked him if they could return home sooner.
Thus, Lucius worked day and night tirelessly, meeting with countless officials one after the other, and their stay in the palace quickly dwindled to just one week. However, he still would’ve done the same even without her request. Returning to the manor, where he isn’t required to share a room with her, was his top priority for now.
Deatrice saw that night as simply a fragment of the past. But Lucius could see things more clearly.
His desire for her had never left his bones. It was he who couldn’t stand whatever bad might happen, so he held her between his arms as if that simple act could shield her from everything.
She didn’t refuse her father’s commands to taint her noble body. But of course, she wouldn’t. Otherwise, the duke would act on his threat against her servant.
Just thinking of what the duke made her do disgusted and pissed him off to no end.
But if there was anything more disgusting than that, it was Lucius himself.
He said he would throw her away, that he would never touch or sleep with her. But he basically ate his own bile when he released his essence inside of her the night before. After waking up, Lucius spent half the day with disgust towards himself. The other half was him trying to get Deatrice’s image out of his head.
Her bare flesh popped into his head. Lucius stopped in his tracks and plunked his head against a nearby statue. Coincidentally, the statue had its head down with its hand forward ready to stroke one’s hair.
It looked like it understood his plight, but Lucius looked at it as if it was mocking him.
Feeling the coldness of the stone removed some of the irateness in his body.
Lucius tried to roll his head, but he felt his head stop automatically when he asked himself a question.
What should I do now?
Yes, what should he do? No—why did he do that in the first place?
He hadn’t made any sort of progress at all when it came to her. But the accident had already happened, and the most important question was whether or not he would abandon her as planned.
A decent man wouldn’t simply abandon the woman he had spent the night with. Moreover, the said woman was the man’s legal wife.
These were the words echoing inside his head.
When Lucius had let his suppressed desires roam free, something inside of him collapsed. Like a veil that kept him from being human was finally lifted. And now, he felt like his soul was naked and on display.
Did they spend the night because they love each other? What did she think about it?
Unable to understand her anymore, he shifted his anger toward the duke who had continuously insulted her and the duchess who exploited her for years.
A fiery, unquenchable rage from six years ago resurfaced. He thought these emotions had already burned out years ago, but everything still felt as fresh and scalding as it had once been.
The insults, the pain, the abandonment… Everything started to feel like yesterday. But the craziest thing was that one emotion was missing.
He couldn’t feel anger towards Deatrice, as if it had vanished overnight.
“…ucy? Lucy… Lucius!”
Lucius was suddenly brought out of his reverie when he heard her call him. Instantly, he recalled certain details in his mind.
Like the way her face scrunched up as she moaned beneath him last night, to the small blush creeping on her face during their first kiss six years ago.
He felt his emotions pouring endlessly and could barely give her a reply as he uttered a simple:
Frowning, Deatrice said. “I thought you came here because you have something to talk about?”
“Ah, right. Sorry. I’ve had a lot on my mind lately.”
He said, closing his eyes tight.
Deatrice looked at his weary eyes and asked, “Did you even get any sleep?”
But even her light concerns felt like a poison that set his insides on fire. What more with her tone and currently worried expression?
Lucius smiled, albeit with much difficulty. He held back his capricious desire to tease and mess with her. Either by abruptly kissing her or… riling her up with some insults…
He wanted to torment her by any means and at the same time he—
No, don’t think any further than that.
He said to himself, choking on the shameful thoughts that emerged in his brain.
“Yes.” He answered. “We can return this afternoon. Rosalynn must’ve told you already.”
“Mm. But Lucius, now that we’re talking about Rosalynn.”
“I don’t really want to talk about that.” He said, not having any good feelings for a servant that harms her master.
Lucius deliberately looked away, but Deatrice finally said what she had to say. “I heard that you summoned her.”
“I only said what needed to be said as her master.”
His eyes hardened, “She’s a servant and she needs to remember her position, not run her mouth about her master’s private business.”
“It’s not for you to meddle.” she snapped back, “Rosalynn’s master is me.”
Her attitude upset Lucius.
How much was she going to sacrifice for that stupid servant?
Those words reverberated in his head, but Lucius persevered against saying them out loud. He would be the one at risk when he raised the topic. So, he ended the conversation with a compromise he didn’t want to make.
“…fine. I’ll take note of it in the future.”
In reality, those were just empty words. Lucius again planned to warn Rosalynn if she dared to do something like that again.