Chapter 241

Chapter 241

Kaichen closed his mouth tightly and averted his gaze, as though harboring a secret that could not be revealed.

Feeling a sense of unease, akin to the time I feared exposing my dreadful memories from a hundred years ago. Yes, ‘that woman’ is Dalia. Not me. The real Dalia, his first love.

Ah, d!mn.

‘Why am I feeling this way… It’s me, anyway. How deceptive the human heart can be,’ I thought to myself.

“I have no memory of the past. I don’t know anything about the time we met that you remember. I don’t know at all,” I confessed.

Kaichen fell silent, his gaze fixed on me.

“Maybe I’ll continue to not know,” I continued, my voice tinged with resignation.

It seemed unlikely that Dalia’s original memories would ever return unless something extraordinary happened. So, I would never truly understand what transpired between Kaichen and Dalia. Even if Kaichen told me, he wouldn’t be able to explain the emotions I felt at that time, or why I acted the way I did.

I didn’t have it easy with Kaichen. Our love-hate relationship didn’t come about without its struggles.

It was evident that I had hurt Kaichen, but now, living as Dalia myself, I couldn’t even offer a proper apology. I didn’t even know what I had said back then.

“I know it might sound selfish and irresponsible, but… can’t you consider the me from then and the me now as different people?” I pleaded.

I hoped that Kaichen would accept this notion. It would be the best outcome, given the circumstances. I couldn’t reveal that I was someone else, that another person was truly in Dalia’s body. I couldn’t heal his wounds, nor could I apologize.

He threw his diary onto the desk as I approached him, my expression clouded with a frown. I felt a surge of jealousy towards my past self.

“It’s strange,” I began, my voice laced with frustration. “I find myself jealous of the old me.”

Kaichen looked at me, taken aback by my confession.

“Isn’t it odd? I can’t remember, so I feel like a different person. That’s why I’m angry at my past self for hurting you and causing you to hate me for so long. The old me had… you all to herself.”

My words weren’t entirely unexpected. They were consistent with my complex emotions.

Expressing my own discontent, I bit my lip, feeling a mix of embarrassment and frustration.

“Even though it may seem foolish, I can’t help but feel envious of the original Dalia,” I admitted, my voice quivering.

This feeling was different from before when I merely speculated that something had occurred between us. I didn’t know the details of the incident, but I had gained insight into Kaichen’s emotions.

“Master, please… can’t you see me as separate from her?”

I was ashamed of my shallow thoughts and lowered my head, unable to meet his gaze. My face burned with embarrassment, and my heart pounded in an unfamiliar way. I knew my ears were turning red without even having to look.

Kaichen didn’t respond immediately. I felt a surge of anxiety as I nervously chewed on my lip.

Even though I knew he cared for me, even though I believed his feelings wouldn’t waver, I found myself easily swayed by my own apprehensions.

Perhaps it was because I had discovered that Kaichen had harbored feelings for Dalia for a long time, and I wasn’t her.

“Dalia,” Kaichen finally spoke, his voice steady.

I raised my head slightly, unable to fully meet his gaze. Instead, I focused on his chest, unable to bear the intensity of his gaze.

As I stared at him with a force that could penetrate his robes, I heard him sigh softly above me.

That sigh was all too familiar, yet hearing it in this particular situation made my shoulders tense.

“How foolish,” he murmured.

“Yes, I may be foolish, but it’s difficult not to feel this way when I can’t remember anything. It’s as if I were an entirely different person,” I admitted, my voice filled with frustration and confusion.

Kaichen’s response caught me off guard. “I’m fine with thinking of it as someone else,” he said, his words sinking into my bewildered mind.

“Huh?” I muttered, unable to comprehend his statement.

He bent down, his gaze fixed on me as he cupped my cheeks, his touch gentle and comforting. With care, he tucked my hair behind my ears and stroked my straight bangs, as if trying to ease away my doubts.

“Dalia Alshine at that time… She was like a child who couldn’t express herself like you do now,” Kaichen explained, his voice carrying a hint of nostalgia.

I remained silent, absorbing his words and trying to make sense of the emotions swirling within me. Different? How could I be so different from the person I used to be?

“The way you smile, the way you act and speak… They are all different,” he continued, his eyes searching mine for understanding.

My heart ached at the revelation, realizing that the Dalia of the past had caused Kaichen so much dislike, hatred, and loathing. Guilt washed over me, and I couldn’t help but ask, “Did I hurt you? What did I say to you?”

He reassured me, dismissing the weight of my past actions. “It was no big deal. However, you were undoubtedly my first love, my first heart, and my first playmate. That’s why it hurt so much.”

A mix of emotions swirled within me—relief that I hadn’t caused irreparable damage, yet a lingering sadness that my previous self had hurt the person I cherished the most.

Frustration built up inside me, and I bit my lip, wanting to take back the harsh judgments I had made about myself earlier. But Kaichen, ever attentive, moved his thumb to press against my lip, urging me to stop.

“You have filled that deep void within me,” he said softly, his voice filled with conviction, “with the person you are now.”

I met his gaze, my eyes brimming with unshed tears. Did my presence truly have the power to change his feelings?

“All my dislike, hatred, and loathing… They have transformed,” he confessed, his touch and words bringing me solace. “Dalia, you can be proud of yourself.”

His words resonated deep within me, a balm for my troubled soul. As Kaichen gently lifted my bangs, a gesture filled with tenderness, he leaned in and pressed a tender kiss to my forehead.