Chapter 211

Chapter 211

I returned to the mansion with Kaichen, trying to remain calm. I didn’t have much appetite and only drank water to keep myself hydrated. We sat next to each other on the living room sofa, and I couldn’t shake off a sense of nervousness.

How should I begin to explain what had happened with the time magic?

“I… turned back time before. You asked me to tell you about it and, um, so…”

My words came out jumbled and I struggled to find the right words. I placed my hands on my lap, clasping them tightly until my fingers turned white. I licked my dry lips and stared off into space, unsure of how to continue.

Kaichen sat patiently, waiting for me to continue speaking.

“Master, in there… you already know… what I did, right?”

A thought crossed my mind as I looked at him. He was someone who never asked me anything. When Antares drugged me and forced me to relive my past memories, he brought out some horrible ones that I had been trying to suppress. But when I came to, I had already been saved by Kaichen, so I thought that he might have seen those memories.

But Kaichen didn’t say anything to me, and I was too afraid to ask. If he had known, I wouldn’t have been able to accept it at the time. I would have tried to run away. No matter how much I loved Kaichen, I hated the fact that he saw such a horrible side of me. I had to run away first before Kaichen abandoned me.

“I always… wanted to ask. Master, I’m terrible… I committed murder… and you knew that. Right?”

Not now. I couldn’t leave Kaichen. The me from two years ago might have left, but now I didn’t want to and couldn’t live a single minute without him.

“Dalia,” he called me. I remained silent. “In the past, you wouldn’t have believed anything I said,” he continued.

“…”

“Among the drugs you were addicted to, you know that Gordon is a drug that destroys the mind, right?”

“…Yes.”

Kaichen calmly ran a hand through his hair as if he had been waiting for a long time to say it.

“The medium of time magic is affected by magic to some extent, you can see that your addiction to the drug continued even while you were trapped in it. The poisoning from the drugs could still affect your mind even within the time magic.”

“That…”

“It’s your mind. You were already addicted to the drug before you were trapped in time magic. The effects of the drug can still continue to affect you even while you’re in the time magic.”

“…”

My head pounded as I processed this information. Although I had been through treatment and was no longer completely dependent on the drugs, the memory of the addiction still lingered. But hearing this information caused a resurgence of pain in my head and eyes.

“Ah..” I subconsciously closed my eyes and covered them with my hands, the sensation of my eyes being poked and prodded returning to me.

“I don’t know about the entire hundred years that you’ve experienced. But if you’re asking if I know about a specific memory you wanted to keep hidden… yes, I know.”

“Ah…” I muttered, my head and eyes throbbing in pain.

My heart pounded in my chest, and a painful m*an escaped my lips.

Kaichen spoke calmly, “Dalia, think clearly. It wasn’t your fault that you lost control of yourself. The drugs and the addiction had already taken hold of your mind.”

“Huk!” I exclaimed, opening my eyes, my mind grappling with this new understanding of my past experiences.

I felt something flow out from my eyes, and in that moment, dark magic flowed out of my body like mist.

I didn’t understand what Kaichen meant. Did he truly believe that I had never lost my mind? If that were true, then what about those hundred years? What were the memories of those hundred years, if not a result of my mind breaking down? Was it possible for magic to make someone lose their mind? And if so, did that mean I had been under their control from the start?

“Dalia, you were never crazy. That couldn’t be you.”

“Argh…”

Kaichen approached me calmly, but his expression was twisted with pain. Seeing me in distress pained him even more.

“Master… that was me!” I said in anguish.

“No, Dalia… That-”

“No! My body, my memories… were like that.”

“Dalia.”

Kaichen looked at me with pity, and gently reached out to touch my cheek. There was red liquic on his hands. I thought it was tears before realizing it was blood. Dark magic shimmered and seemed to be closing in on Kaichen, who was emitting a brilliant light.

Kaichen said that the terrible memory from those hundred years was a symptom of poisoning, but I couldn’t agree with him. I couldn’t deny that I had done those things, even if my mind was broken. It was an undeniable truth and part of my memory.

I wanted to confront the person responsible for my current state.

I wanted to make them feel the pain and hurt they had caused me.

I could feel the shimmering black magic within me pulsing wildly in sync with my emotions. I trembled at the intensity of the magic and bit my lip.

Yes, even though I am filled with anger, not now. I must put aside my feelings of pure fury and distress. Not now. I willed myself. Kaichen will get hurt!