Chapter 39.2

Chapter 39.2

No, Richard is also a noble, so he might be unable to avoid it altogether… but… Still… I understand it in my head. I get it. I understand the gist of it. But, but…

Why does it hurt so much, and why do I feel betrayed?

Did I indulge in baseless desires? Am I asking for too much? Am I being naive?

Jasmine blinked her eyes several times and bit her nails. She had been so absorbed in thought that she didn’t realize she was crying. Her chest hurt too much.

Sniffling, Jasmine whimpered. It hurt even more because she had been so happy, excited, and thrilled, only to be suddenly thrown into despair.

If only she had just admired him silently. But now, Jasmine was different from the Jasmine of that time. She wasn’t the girl who blindly liked Richard and resigned to it.

Richard poured out too much affection. The problem was that he gave too much as if pouring water. Despite Jasmine’s efforts to avoid it and stabilize her feelings, she couldn’t help but have expectations.

After all, Jasmine was also human. She liked him a lot, truly.

It would have been less disappointing if he had explained his situation beforehand.

What do I know about Richard? Do I know anything at all? I thought I knew, but now I see I didn’t know anything at all.

She was shockingly ignorant. She didn’t know anything about his situation, circumstances, why he treated her so well, and she didn’t even understand Richard’s feelings.

Does he like me? To what extent and for what purpose does he like me? Does he genuinely love me as a person, like pure human love? Really? Not because I’m suitable and decent and enjoyable? Not because he finds me more… accessible and pleasant than that Lily woman?

It might be because it’s her first love. That’s why it’s so excessive, so overwhelming as if her whole body is breaking apart.

“Jasmine?”

Jasmine was startled. It seemed like she fell asleep after crying. Someone came through the door. A familiar gait, and the scent of his body resembled a cool forest.

A hand gently lowered her upper body, and she felt the hand gripping the strands of her hair.

Richard truly loved Jasmine’s abundant golden hair. Whenever he got the chance, he would kiss her, bury his nose in her mane, and smell it.

His expression seemed genuinely happy and content when he devoutly kissed the handful of golden hair he held in his hand. Richard, who was always calm but subtly stubborn and proud, appeared comfortable and at ease in that moment.

Jasmine liked him in those moments.

She quietly accepted his touch and then deliberately made a sound.

“Are you awake?”

Richard, who quickly withdrew his hand, called her affectionately. Feeling a twinge in her chest for a moment, Jasmine furrowed her brows. Thinking she was annoyed at being awakened, Richard chuckled lightly and tidied her hair.

But instead of smiling at him as usual, she looked at what he held with a slight frown. The fragrance was so strong that her gaze involuntarily drifted towards it.

“Ah.”

Richard held out what he was holding. His eyebrows flickered slightly as if he was embarrassed.

“Flowers. You said you wanted them.”

It was a bunch of fresh roses in full bloom. It had a fresh scent as if it had just been picked.

Unlike her heart.

“Jasmine?”

Richard called out in confusion as she silently gazed at the fully bloomed rose in her hand. She moved only her eyes, staring at his innocent face.

Her face was affectionate and, at the same time, ugly. Enduring those contrasting emotions was difficult, and the sharp edges stabbed at her heart.

Jasmine reluctantly accepted the bouquet, avoiding eye contact. Even though she loved flowers, the scent was so strong that it gave her a headache.

But with the inevitable expectation of facing him, she lowered her head, pretending to smell the flowers. The mist-like fragrance penetrated deep into her nostrils. It felt like drinking poison.

“I should put it in a vase. It will wither quickly.”

Jasmine muttered. She turned her head, pretending to carefully place the flowers.

“Where did you get them? Is there a rose garden here?”

“His Highness the Crown Prince has a small glass garden.”

“Ah.”

He may have answered sincerely, but Jasmine, trying to distract herself, remembered the conversation from earlier and felt depressed again.

Watching her expression closely, Richard took Jasmine’s hand and continued speaking.

“It is a garden owned by the previous Empress, and she passed it on to His Highness, her son before she left the empire. In fact, our family originally owned this manor. My grandfather transferred the rights to the imperial family as a dowry during the royal marriage. This level of access is personal, so they will turn a blind eye.”

Sensitive to hierarchy, Jasmine had worried and considered it a big deal, so he explained at length to reassure her. However, contrary to his intentions, shadows darkened Jasmine’s eyes.